what do we do with kids in our culture?

July 8, 2008 § 1 Comment

this is a great post from border land academic: children and community

which reminds me alot of our visioning for revolutionary motherhood.  i especially resonated with the part that having a party where children were not invited or would not be safe is so well…anglo.  so for the 4th of july we were invited to a friends, watch the fireworks party on her roof.  to get to the roof is a drop ladder.  and of course the roof has low to no ledges.  not safe for a one year old who loves to run around and interact.  so we hung out at the apartment instead.

we had a great 4th.  she loved the fireworks.  we reminisced about chiapas and west bank and other places that are fireworks cultures.  i heard that the other party was good too.  but i think back to all the childless parties i have attended and how they could feel a little vapid.   the joy gets cynical.  everyone is a little bored.  so many people are worried if they look good and feeling insecure.  i am thinking about a friend of mine in chiapas who who always seemed so dissatisfied at a bar or a dance club.  she could never just let go.  thinking all of these people were judging her.  and all of her negative judgements of them.  and i am realizing that the best parties i have gone to, had kids at them.  mine or someone’s. because kids are so spontaneous and fun and excited by every little thing that you get excited too about shit that normally you wouldnt notice.

i am especially remembering a party that we went to in chiapas that was celebrating promedios anniversary.  the party was at barco pirata an anarchist house.  there was great salsa.  and we danced and chatted.  but after a couple of hours i got bored.  like i wasnt trying to hook up with someone or get slobbering drunk.  and the music was really too loud for a decent conversation.  so i went home, got my partner and kid, (who were sleeping) and took them back to the party.  the party had wound down a bit and suddenly i was having the time of my life.  we passed aza around.  she gained the nickname: fiestera.  we put on miseducation of lauryn hill and there were like 5 of us on the dance floor belting out the words.

people told us how inspiring it was to see three of us dancing, aza giggling shamelessly and making faces at everyone as we twirled her around.  then we went home and slept in late.

i kinda feel sorry now for people at parties trying to look cool and deep and strike a pose.  feeling insecure and faking confidence.    when i walk in with my kid i know i am one of the sexiest and coolest people in the place.  because i dont have time to be fake when she is around.  i am too busy laughing at my lil charlie chaplin with the big brown eyes and wild einstein hair.

§ One Response to what do we do with kids in our culture?

  • thealeticia says:

    Gracias for the props and a solid resounding non-sectarian Hell Yeah!

    I got to dance salsa and cumbias with a baby on the fourth and actually have some of these discussions when the mama was saying that she enjoyed the get-togethers because she knew she could relax and enjoy herself and the baby would be passed around and enjoyed and cared for. Here’s to radical revisioning of motherhood, community, and good parties!


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